Real Life. Uncensored. Uncut.

It is 4:00 in the morning and I can't sleep. Writing helps me get tired, feel better, and frankly, I just like it. Anyway, I'm sitting down to blog, and my mind screams divergently compelling instructions about what to say. I'm not yet sure which will win out, so this may be a very chaotic, nonsensical post.

I want to write about good, happy things. Aden is home! He turned eight this week! I had high hopes of posting a beautiful compilation of photos of his growth through the years. I can't believe he is eight. He has worked so hard to get caught up with his school work! He declared proudly last week that he finished his last test, bringing him up to date with everything. We are so proud at how bright he is, and how diligently he has worked.

So many things were accomplished with Vince and Chad's visit last weekend - we have half a deck now! The dirt pile and the railroad ties are out of the yard. It looks so much better. I can't believe how cool it is to walk out onto a level platform outside the garage, and I think it is going to be such a great space. The guys worked SOOO hard, and I was no help aside from meals, and no treat when I wanted to understand, but didn't, the progress and logic of the tasks.

Dave and I went out for a quiet dinner on our own Tuesday night to my favorite restaurant even though Dave has been craving pizza ("RED SAUCE, THE NECTAR OF LIFE!!" claims Dave). This was a big deal, as we were ready for a break and we had a nice time away.

I posted this quote on Facebook last week because it really hit home, "Taking in the good is not about putting a happy shiny face on everything, nor is it about turning away from the hard things in life. It's about nourishing inner well-being, contentment, and peace -- refuges to which you can always return." - Rick Hanson.

In the spirit of writing about real life, I say that lots of things have been good, but a number of things have been rocky since we've been home, too. That's just life as we all know it. No shock there.

Aden is better overall, and back to school. But, he has been at the nurse's office with headaches, stomache aches, fatigue, and yesterday, a fever. He has come home from school before the end of the day as many days as he has made it through. I can't deny that this concerns me greatly - in the back of my mind I'm wondering if his pneumonia is coming back. Whether these thoughts are warranted is a valid question since he did, after all, spend three weeks in bed and undergo surgery, all of which merits a recovery period. Nevertheless, he will see a doctor tomorrow, even if it is just for the doctor to confirm that this is normal and tell me I'm over-reacting. During Aden's best moments, you'd never know he was ever sick at all. We are grateful for those moments.

I think it is normal that we've been overwhelmed lately, but I am going to post this because it just has to be used for some greater purpose, in this case, comedy.

So, it goes without saying we've been worried about Aden. It goes without saying we've been catching up on tasks at home and work. It goes without saying this hasn't been a great couple of months. It seems like that is enough said. But actually, it isn't.

It is like the cats felt similarly unsettled and began to manifest their own set of symptoms. Bobcat has sores and increased respiratory symptoms that have been diagnosed as asthma. Solution? Daily medication started last Friday... That isn't helping, by the way, so back to the vet I'm sure we'll go. And this even more illustrious example: At 3:30 AM last week as I entered my laundry room to get something while preparing to take Dad to the airport, I realized that one of the cats had peed in there... YUP, on all the clean clothes and bedding I'd been working to catch up on since we got home. It was at that particular moment that Dad commented about the new washer and dryer, as if to come see them quick before he left. Instead of collapsing into an adult-sized tantrum, I whooshed out the door to the airport.

I thought the issue was an isolated coincidence - we were gone - perhaps the litter boxes just got scooped a little less often with all the commotion - they've never done this before - it's over now - YAY WE HAVE A GREAT NEW WASHER AND DRYER TO RE-WASH EVERYTHING! No problem. I can be positive about it, I thought. We'll keep the door shut and I put out another box. Makes sense, right?

Nope. Yesterday I discovered the cat peeing out of the litter box again. Where this time? ON OUR BED. Ever had a cat pee on your bed? Well, I hope you never do, fine readers, because it is one of the most offensive experiences imaginable. And, why do I post this, you wonder? Well, imagine me... Stressed, worried, overwhelmed, irritable... Find a cat peeing on my bed, and upon further inspection discover it isn't the first time...

Have a little laugh - you really want to, I just know it. Imagine me ***LOSING IT***

Deep breath.

Ever have those crawl-out-of-your-skin moments because everything seems unbearable but you know in your head that none of it is really that bad? Really, you tick down the list of things that are RIGHT in your life, things that far outweigh the bumpy spots? You KNOW none of the stressors are really a big deal? You know in your heart that you wouldn't REALLY trade your life for anyone else's that you can think of, but still you feel like you just can't take one more moment of something going awry? The stuff of CALGON, TAKE ME AWAY? Then you feel badly because things seem like a big deal when they could be so much worse so you just want to shut up and not sound like a complainer? But then you tell someone or post a really long blog about it anyway and then feel really stupid, but somehow it made you feel better and you laugh about it?

Well, that's what I'm doing now.

PS. I would have posted the beautiful retrospective of Aden's eight years had Blogger photo upload been working correctly. That was annoying, but entirely less upsetting than the cat peeing on the bed.